For most of the world, a “blowout” means a professional blow dry at a hair salon. For parents, it means something else entirely. The English language is funny like that…
Anyway, my husband and I were in the middle of tag-teaming a GIGANTIC blowout diaper change when the following conversation ensued:
Husband: (Trying to make the best of it holding Madeleine up while I attempt to wipe her) Well, they say you’re not a parent until—
Me: (Showing him my freshly poop-encrusted nails) Until you’ve got shit under your fingernails?
Husband: Really? Is that a real saying?
Me: No, I totally just made that up.
(Both of us laugh at the absurdity of the situation. Aaaannnnd, scene.)
But it’s totally true. And no one talks about how difficult this is! So, to all of you fellow parents, I salute you for your steadfast “clean or bust” resolve, and your unwavering bravery in the face of many a poop storm. It is highly admirable and I commend you.
(Please check out my blog at amommynous.tumblr.com for more parental absurdities!)